Blog - Wholethy Tribe Wellness

Life Energy Vampires Suck: What to do to get…

Hands down the most consistent discussion that I’ve had with my patients and clients over the years, aside from “why can’t I lose the weight,” is awareness and disconnection around life energy vampires (which 9 times out of 10 are interconnected). Most of them come to me literally draining energy from all areas of their life without conscious awareness. They are wrought with weight loss issues, body inflammation, mental acuity problems, and many other health problems wondering why they can’t seem to feel whole again. Quite possibly they’ve been shifted out of balance for so long they don’t even know what whole feels like anymore.

Can you relate? I know I can. At various points in my life I have felt like a cartoon character with drain holes all over my body leaking energy like a sieve having nothing left to offer.

If we don’t prioritize discovering the source(s) where energy is being tapped, our amazing beautiful bodies are going to try and try to keep us in homeostasis (aka balance), but at a high dollar cost to our well being.

By the way, it doesn’t only have to be individuals that are vampires. Anything that is perceptually withdrawing from your life energy banks and not making deposits can be considered a vampire. For example …

Maybe, the restrictive diet you’ve been on doesn’t allow you to disconnect from the persistent food dialogue in your head thus chronically increasing your stress levels.

Or, you’ve been dying to start a new hobby, but you’ve been telling yourself that you don’t have the time or resources, therefore, you continue to prioritize everyone & everything else above your joy.

Possibly, you feel like your job makes you a different person and not for the better. However, you make excuses why you can’t leave. Meanwhile, your relationships with loved ones have been suffering due to you being disconnected, checked out or short fused.

There are so many ways we can leak energy. We just have to find and increase awareness around them so we can plug up those ‘hole leaks’. Remember, there is only so much fuel in our tank.

FUN FACT: The brain takes in 11 million pieces of data and only consciously processes about 40 bits of that every second. Freeing up space helps to cultivate what matters most in your life.

Sooo, do we walk around donning garlic chains around our necks?

If it were only that simple. Let’s look at a few steps that you can start doing right away. I would recommend using a journal or notebook for this process.

BUT, FIRST!

I want to express that while currently some of you may feel supported with the appropriate resources to dive right in, some of you might need to seek support during this process. Either way, I encourage you to be honest with yourself and work with a professional to provide additional support if needed. This might look like a therapist/psychologist, parishioner or life guide like myself.

ALSO,

please don’t forget to offer yourself grace during this process bc it might require you to make decisions that you don’t want to make and/or learn about yourself as well as others in your life.

Remember, we are all perfectly imperfect.

Work with me!

Ok, here we go …

#1 What are your values?

Do you even know them? These guys are important to know bc they guide your actions, give life meaning and allow us to persevere. Consider them your guiding lights to help you navigate the seas of life.

If you’re not sure …

Google search values and choose 6-8 from the list that resonate with you. Then sit with them for awhile to narrow down the ones that feel authentic to you. How do you know if they are authentic: When you do the ‘thing,’ do you feel drained or energetic and happy?
Observe and learn what you are expressing or living by consistently. This might help guide you towards the ones that feel right.
Still not sure? You can think of 3-6 people you most admire or love. What values do they embody?

#2 What is your belief system?

Are they currently aligned with your values? Are they authentically yours, harnessed from external sources (culture, family, media, etc) or outdated bc you’re at a different point in life? Are they limiting thus effecting your well being?

#3 Get curious (observe) without judgement.

How do you feel daily? Can you pinpoint when you feel drained or stressed? What areas in your life need attention that you’re unable to provide bc you feel drained? What would it look/feel like if you were able to give those areas attention? How would your life change?

Other areas that could be sucking your life energy …

Negative thought patterns
Behaviors & Habits
Relationships: toxic people/traits such as gaslighters, stonewallers, manipulators, victim mentality, gossipers, conflict avoidance, arrogance, passive-aggressive, dishonesty, etc.
Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms: substance abuse, emotional eating or bingeing, excessive screen time, impulse spending, gambling, over-reliance of others, overworking, avoidance/denial, withdrawal socially, overexercise

This process of increased awareness helps direct effective action of auditing these life energy suckers that create an out-of-balance wellness for you.

Free yourself from these energy leaks for good, start building up your energy banks and live a more authentic life that allows you to thrive!

Learn how to take action & thrive!

Nutrition

Weight Loss Resistance: What Your Doc Might Not Know

I’ve been here myself. I feel your frustration. I’ve even had individuals in my office so fed up with their bodies due to weight loss resistance that they grab and shake the areas that bring them the most disdain.

I would argue that at some point in our lives we have all expressed the feeling of “Why can’t I just lose the weight?”

For most of us, we end up taking deep dives into the seas of diet culture and wellness sites praying that the answer is located somewhere within these depths only to realize that we are gasping for air as we float further away from ourselves and reality.

Did you know that there has been a ‘life raft’ within our reach since the day we were born to save us from being lost out at this turbulent sea of diet culture and wellness promises?

It’s right inside us! Don’t believe me? Take a moment to think about what a true miracle our body is with its life purpose of keeping us alive. As a newborn, you are inherently connected to what your body needs for survival – food, sleep, poop, socially connect, and repeat. Intuitive eating professionals, like myself, call this attunement or tuning into your body’s signals with 100% trust that it knows what you need. Point being somewhere along our life span, for many reasons, we started listening THEN believing what external sources were telling us.

We fell victim to their energetic pull perpetuating our own personal form of gaslighting: body criticism and weight stigma.

It could have been a loved one, social media, coach, teacher, spiritual leader, doctor or quite possibly the marketing magic of the food industry. With each pull we slowly started disconnecting from our inherent wisdom which over time nudged us out of balance.

Yes, there are underlying physiological reasons for weight loss resistance such as hypothyroidism, insulin resistance, inflammation, hormonal imbalances and metabolic adaptation. You probably have also heard that lifestyle factors – inadequate sleep, chronic stress, dietary choices, activity level – are big contenders too.

But, what if you’ve checked all the lifestyle boxes and have done everything with a significant amount of effort? Is that all she wrote? Is it time to shrug your shoulders and tap out thinking ‘I gave it the ol’ college try?’

There is hope and strength from the shining light within the lighthouse of our souls to help realign and rebalance what was once thought to be lost! However, remember the life raft that you’ve always had? It is time to grab on to that bad boy because this is an inside job and the seas will most likely get rough before they calm.

The mind, body and spirit communicate with each other every moment. If there are unprocessed or unconscious emotions, experiences and beliefs, they have the ability to play out in the physical body and create blockages. Increasing awareness, resolving and gaining new perspective surrounding unprocessed stuff from the past is a way to reconnect with our inherent wisdom and unblock what keeps us stuck to bring us home to self. But, guess what . . .

Researchers as well as Louise Hay, the author of the international bestseller Heal Your Body, and Inna Segal, author of The Secret Language of Your Body, have linked emotional blockage with weight gain and weight loss resistance. With that being said, can you relate to any of the following?

Insecurity and/or need for protection – usually past or present trauma

Negative food experiences when younger

Angry on the inside

Self-rejection

Running away from feelings

Forgiveness resistance

Oversensitive

Fulfillment seeker, positive memories of food or beliefs tied to deserving of a treat as a reward

Anger at being denied love, support, and/or nourishment – usually from an authority figure

Work with me! If you answered yes to any of these statements, you might consider working with myself and/or a therapist to support you through this journey of weight loss resistance discovery.

Motivation

Need a little encouragement to take the first step…

Completing one of the biggest achievements in my life, a Master of Science in Clinical Nutrition, was no small feet especially bc it was in the midst of battling Leukemia to fight for my life.

Buuuut, I don’t need that big, fancy degree for me to tell you that by making small positive changes, life will be a WHOLE lot more in balance. I’m living proof! It definitely hasn’t been easy to get to this point, but I allowed myself to be open to the idea of being vulnerable – I’ll touch on vulnerability in a second.

Making a commitment to yourself and making small habitual changes can truly create a positive cascading effect in your life.

How do I know this? I know this bc I’ve witnessed it first hand, not just within myself, but with clients like you, my dance students of all ages, family, friends, cancer patients who were going through the same mental and physical challenges that I was as well as the nutrition students that I volunteer teach for through the local food bank.

Battling a blood cancer has not been easy. And when I say not easy – I mean AT ALL no way no how!!!

I remember when I was in the throws of it all one of my nurses said to me just take it “one day at a time.” I was like excuse me, “one day at a time?!” All I wanted was for the nightmare to be over and go back to my ‘normal’ life again.

Guess what? As days passed, I eventually realized she was absolutely right! By reframing my outlook and focusing on the good . . . like being able to get out of the hospital bed, being able to walk a full lap around the 7th floor on my own w/o assistance & then THE best day ever happened when I was able to do my first jumping jack in over a year . . . allowed me to take baby steps to be right here with you today!!

Let me go back to vulnerability for a second.

What does it mean to be strong? I believe that strength is born from allowing yourself to be vulnerable. I’m going to say that again to let it sink in . . . Strength is gained from vulnerability!

It’s uncomfortable to start a new habit or modify an old one and disrupt your daily routine. Which if you truly think about it, in reality your daily routine really is just a bunch of different habits blended together over the years.

So, if you say, Erika I decided to make a new habit of not eating dessert after dinner as one of my wellness goals; I would say amazing you just made the 1st step towards a wholethy life! Then I would follow that statement up with you’re probably going to be uncomfortable for a bit, but this is actually a really good thing bc that means a change is happening. Woohoo!

One of the main reasons why we choose not to change is bc it’s absolutely uncomfortable being vulnerable to step outside our norm, comfort zone or routine. Our brains like to keep us comfy and cozy with no surprises. I liken it to the experience we have when your parents take away your binkie or favorite toy when you were a child.

Some of you might be thinking, Erika, deciding to cut sugar from my diet to help with weight loss goals or starting a meditation practice to cope with stress & anxiety or deciding to put Starbuck’s $$ into a retirement fund is completely different than your situation bc you didn’t have a choice. I would say, you’re right on some level I didn’t have a choice, but I could’ve chosen to give up. I didn’t.

I chose to keep diggin’ deep within and mustered the determination to stare down the ‘barrel of the gun’ and say Oh hellzzz no, not today!!!

This is actually a real brain thing called neuroplasticity. I won’t bore you with the details, but it means that our brains can rewire neural pathways to create new thought patterns in lieu of the once believed halted brain growth after a certain age. This is awesome news for us! We can essentially train our brain to think differently than the old, dusty thought patterns that don’t service us any more.

By taking it one day at a time it gets a little bit easier as time goes on and eventually it isn’t so uncomfortable any more. So, you make a conscious effort to keep going and going and going and with this process you’re not only growing as a person, but you’re getting a whole lot . . . STRONGER!!!

Sometimes we choose not to take the first step bc the mountain in front of us seems way to massive to conquer. But, by breaking down the mountain into sections to create smaller goals within that monstrosity will have you proudly standing at the top of YOUR mountain peak in no time. It only takes one step forward!!

Thrive well my beautiful friend ❤️

Work with me!

Wellness

When Life Gives You Lemons

The pandemic has made me a little crazy! How about you?! Check back later for some fun, inspirational and educational wellness writings from someone who knows a thing or two about what to do when faced with the ol’ adage ‘when life throws ya lemons.’ In the mean time, have fun PLAYING with your food!